The Gays (2014)

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Directed by: T.S. Slaughter

At points I wondered if ‘The Gays’ was the worst film I’ve ever seen. It is certainly provocative and each scene attempts to make you hate it, but I think that’s the bite.  Part of me thinks that filmmaker T.S. Slaughter is craving negative reviews and a spiral of hate to whip up some attention.

Essentially ‘The Gays’ plays almost completely on OTT gay stereotypes, and ratchets these stereotypes to the point where they go beyond parody and satire and into the profoundly annoying. There are moments which remind me of John Waters at his most trashy, and bizarrely certain parts reminded me of the surreal South Park episode ‘Major Boobage’, only with dicks instead of tits. But sadly it’s mostly terrible with few redeeming qualities. There’s nothing clever or funny about this film.

Throughout the movie, which thankfully only lasts for a little over an hour, I felt like I was constantly being asked subliminally by the people who made this film to “Go, on. Turn this off. You know you want to”.

The Gays are the kind of strange incestuous family you might find in an American Sitcom from the 70s, a overwhelming homosexual antithesis to hetero-campy The Brady Bunch. You have Bob and Rod (Mum and Dad) and their two kids Alex and Tommy. The film floats between Alex chatting to a guy called called Kevin at an LA gay bar (“LA’s an easy place to be gay”) and flashbacks featuring the disturbing domestic bliss of the Gays as Alex fondly reminisces about his family.

The shockfactor rating on this film oscillates between 95 to 100%. You’ve got anal sex, a “tranny” (using the character’s own description of them self) giving birth out of his rectum (think ‘Alien’ meets ‘The Exorcist’ on a budget) and the opening scene which features a more disturbing vision of childhood than the revelations that have come out of Lena Dunham’s latest book.

http://youtu.be/qLOHzdANJOg

I’m not quite sure what’s going to make people watch this movie other than if this site, and several other reviewers declare it as “the worst film they’ve ever seen” or award it zero stars or on the ‘On Cinema at the Cinema’ scale – no bags of popcorn and no sodas.

Sexploitation cinema that sucks. ‘The Gays’ is a ridiculously bad film. I hated it.

 

– RJW

0/10

 

 

To learn more about ‘The Gays’ visit:

http://www.thegaysmovie.com/index.html

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The Great Texas Dynamite Chase (1976)

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Directed by: Michael Pressman

Texas seems to be the best place in America to tell stories about desperate people in forgotten small towns that aren’t even marked on the map. ‘The Great Texas Dynamite Chase’ opens with the kind of copper coloured scenery that screams hard toil. You can’t imagine anything would grow under the unrelenting burning sun. An auburn haired beauty dressed in baby blue prison attire runs across the field as glorious country music plays. This was a time when songs in movies were quite literal, so a woman sings “dynamite, dynamite”.

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The auburn haired woman is named Candy, played by the late 1970 Playmate of the Year Claudia Jennings. Candy decides to rob a bank to pay for her family home which is under the risk of being repossessed. Her plan involves using dynamite as a bargaining tool. She became familiar with demolition when doing work in prison, so it makes sense to grab a few sticks and light a fuse before the big boom. She walks in to the small town bank, and calmly states her demands as the fuse burns. Candy gets away with the loot. The traumatic event leaves an impression on Ellie-Jo, a bank teller who lost her job seconds before the robbery took place. Whilst her former colleagues all stood around petrified, Ellie-Jo revelled in the excitement and was very helpful to the bank robber. It was almost like a game.

‘The Great Texas Dynamite Chase’ seems like a prototype ‘Thelma & Louise’. A day after the robbery Candy picks up Ellie-Jo on the roadside in a moment of serendipity. Ellie-Jo surprises Candy by saying “I got an idea, let’s rob another bank!” There’s no real build up to this, Candy is a girl with nothing to lose, who knows nothing but the life of crime, she doesn’t need to be convinced, even from a stranger she’s picked up by the side of the road. Ellie-Jo is a bored former bank worker who is desperate for excitement. Likely, the first time for a while that she truly felt alive was when she was caught up in the bank robbery. Perhaps suffering from Stockholm syndrome she is immediately drawn to Candy, who represents everything she isn’t.

The film never stands still, and doesn’t really allow for much reflection, the ladies are caught in the moment, going from adventure to adventure. Robbing banks, holding up convenience stores and having plenty of guilt free sex; this means there’s not a great deal of character development. It is disappointing that we don’t learn more about our two anti-heroines.

Candy and Ellie-Jo manage to outwit some of the dimmest policemen in film history. There is a car chase almost as outrageous as the one from ‘The Blues Brothers’. I can’t help but think that the film is missing a Frank Hamer (‘Bonnie and Clyde’) figure, an authority figure, an uptight lawman, who is trying to track down the dynamite bank robbers. The police just tend to spring up like they do in Grand Theft Auto, seemingly out of nowhere.

‘The Great Texas Dynamite Chase’ breaks the mould, in that women are outlaws on the run. They have the control, and the men in the film are the damsel figures, the hopeless pieces of arm candy. Be it Jake, the eternally shirtless hunk who is used and exploited for explosives, or the hapless Slim who is picked up as a hostage at a convenience store. I’m not a hundred percent sure whether the film was intended to be an exercise in feminism. It could be also be interpreted as a titillating sexploitation flick. I suppose however you look at it; there ‘The Great Texas Dynamite Chase’ provides a little something for everyone.

– RJW
6/10

The Great Texas Dynamite Chase on IMDB