Rock n Roll Space Patrol Action Is Go (2005)

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I think Troma reached a tipping point of sorts with this. One on end, actual motion pictures; on the other, home movies. I would lay money on at least one person reading this having made something about as good as this with their friends over the course of a boring summer holiday, so why Troma chose to release this, I have absolutely no idea. It’s not the beginning of any glorious careers – in fact, for just about everyone involved, it’s their sole credit of any kind; and it’s not so much bad as it is a bit…pointless?

Buck Fiesta is a Space Ranger sent in his intergalactic spaceship, which strongly resembles a battered old car, to a far distant part of the galaxy, which strongly resembles Springfield, Missouri. He meets up with Red Arrow, and the two of them fight to take down a bunch of space-ninjas, a mad scientist and so on. They fight in the middle of a field, mainly, but they also have a conference in a garage and flash back to an event taking place near a bonfire. Now, the bonfire bit is so obviously home movie footage that I started to get a bit annoyed.

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Now, there’s two ways of looking at this. One is to completely dismiss it as the cheap nothing of a movie it undoubtedly is – four or five friends spent a summer and (according to IMDB) $3000 making a movie to entertain themselves and their social circle. If I knew one of them, I’d have been round their house watching the premier of it and would have undoubtedly been impressed with what they’d achieved. But, Troma have elevated it to some level of legitimacy by attaching their name to it and selling it for real money (despite it being available for free on Youtube, you can still buy it from their website). When you start charging money for something, it being a tiny bit above the level of a well-done home movie just isn’t enough.

This isn’t the cheapest movie we’ve covered on here – “Manborg” cost under $1000, if I remember right; and I don’t think “Swamp Zombies” can have cost much more than than $3000. “The Slashening” (just picked up by Troma) only cost $6000. So there’s not the excuse of extreme cheapness to let them off.

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I’m sorry. I feel like I’ve just done the equivalent of write a thousand words about a knock-knock joke. It’s clearly not meant to be taken seriously, at all. But use your limited time on this earth more wisely and watch something else.

Rating: thumbs down

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